#it's the endless mirroring of percieving for me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tanadrin · 4 months ago

Text

And Verchiel stormed into the halls of heaven, even unto the shining throne of God, where countless choirs of angels sang in great wheeling throngs about the brilliant maelstrom of light in which the Creator was enthroned; and at his feet sat his scribe Metatron, and by his side stood the seven Archangels, glorious and terrible in their panoply, their weapons fashioned from the hearts of stars, their eyes burning with the fire of time; and all the glory of the cosmos was reflected in this place, yet changed; as it would forever be undiminished in even the smallest respect. And Verchiel, whose own shining face was streaked with dirt and sweat, whose white tunic was dusty and ragged, and whose sandals had a broken strap that was hastily tied up again, hurled something at the foot of the throne of the Possessor Who Subdues Evil and Oppression.

And the Archangels looked; and so did Metatron; and Metatron looked to God, who nodded. So Metatron got up, and went over, and picked up the thing; it was a small wooden toy, carved like a horse, that was wet with blood.

And the voice of God spoke, which sounded higher than the heavens and deeper than the abyss, which filled every nook and cranny of that un-space and echoed out through all of un-time; and the choirs fell silent, and ceased to move; and all of heaven turned to listen.

"Why have you brought me this, Verchiel?" God asked.

Verchiel was full of anger; and he had been for a long time. This rage had finally boiled over within him, and he had ascended through the infinite realms of reality with a thousand bitter curses on the tip of his tongue; but he had not anticipated a question so simple, so obvious, so stupid as this, and he stumbled over his words.

"Why?" he asked, thundering as well as he could manage. "Why? How--how can you ask me that?" he said. "At a time like this!"

"A time like what?" God asked patiently.

Verchiel sputtered again, then turned, thinking maybe he should just go; then he turned back around, and stomped closer to the throne of infinite light.

"He's dead!" he yelled. "The prince of Moab is dead! Did you know that? Did you know that would happen??" He turned to Michael, who stood silent and stone-faced beside the throne. "Did you?" He pointed at Metatron, who was calmly scribbling away. "Did you, O scribe?! Did you know that he would die??"

And the archangels looked at one another; they seemed, if anything, a bit confused. But Verchiel wheeled around and threw up his hands at the circling choirs, and the bearers of trumpets and harps and drums and banners, and all the glorious throng that surrounded them, and he yelled at them, too. "Did any of you know?!" he asked. "Did any of you care?"

And when he was done, God spoke again.

"What, O Angel of Grace, fills thy heart with such agony?" God asked.

"You know," Verchiel said sorrowfully. "Don't pretend you don't know."

"Indeed, I know and percieve all," God said. "But you all usually find it rude when I do both parts of a conversation."

Verchiel looked down at the flawless parapet of gemstones and precious metals that bridged the gap between the immense doorway and the throne. It wasn't even real gemstones, or real metals. It was some perfected version of these things, shorn of all their limitations, exalted beyond anything a mortal mind could imagine. He looked around at the endless glories of heaven. He wanted to cuss, and spit at them all, and tear them all down. What a mockery. He remembered when heaven had been a small pocket of unreality, a little workshop beside the great ontological gap that would become the universe. He remembered when heaven was just a handful of angels and God, tinkering with basic physics, trying to get this enormous thing that cried out for Being up and running. Now…

Now it was a reflection of that universe. Its exalted mirror. But it was more than that. It was an exalted mirror of a thing imagined in the minds of mortals. Beyond anything they could imagine, of course. Where the smallest detail was cosmic in its scope, where the most trivial true descriptor held more profundity than all the languages that had ever been spoken. As the universe that God had built had taken shape, so, too, had the heaven that must necessarily reflect it: perfect, eternal, the consummation of a cosmos that for all its flaws, that must have its true perfection elsewhere. This was that perfection. And Verchiel hated it with every fiber of his being. It disgusted him.

"The prince of Moab is dead," Verchiel said again. "A no-account little boy, in a no-account little kingdom, on the no-account ass end of a little planet, in a no-account galaxy, somewhere off down there, far away. But he's dead because of you. So many are. And I'm sick of it."

"Azazel!" God called out. And there was a flash of lightning and a sound of thunder; and a figure of darkness appeared at the foot of the Throne. He was mantled in silence, his robes the color of oblivion, and he carried a scythe whose blade was night and whose edge was ruin; and of him, even the archangels seemed afraid. In this place of light and glory, he was a terrible wound, a void of light and hope.

"Azazel," God said, "Dost thou confirm what Verchiel says? Is the prince of Moab dead?"

Azazel nodded, then spoke. His voice was howl of the accretion jets of a black hole, and the choirs above covered their ears. "Yes, O Possessor of Greatness. The prince of which Verchiel speaks died this morning."

"How did he die?" God asked.

"On the walls of Kir Hareseth, his father cut his throat," Azazel said. He spoke with utter calm, as if giving a weather report. "When the battle began to turn against him, he spilled his blood in sacrifice to Chemosh, his god; and this inspired a fury among his men, and they were like a storm against their foes. So the enemy withdrew, to return to their own land."

God turned back to Verchiel.

"Am I Chemosh?" he asked him. "Am I the king of Moab?"

"Don't pretend like you didn't know!" Verchiel cried. "Don't pretend like this has nothing to do with you!"

"They are also what they choose to be," God said.

"Bullshit! You can fool cherubs with that sophistry, but not me. You put your thumb on the scale! You made a universe of hunger and pain and sorrow. Then you dropped them into it and now whenever they rip each other's throats out you're like, sorry! Free will and all that!"

"I am sorry that my Creation displeases thee," God said. And indeed his voice did seem to echo with sorrow; all the sorrow that Verchiel was capable of, and more. But it just made Verchiel angrier.

Verchiel turned to Azazel. "And you! I saw you there. I saw you on the walls. You think you're so high and mighty! They might be scared of you"--he pointed to the choirs--"but I knew you when you were a two-bit cherub who didn't know the difference between an electron and an elephant. This… getup. You swanning about like you're the living retribution. You thought you were playing a part. Then you became the part. Then you forgot, and now you're a monster who delights in their suffering."

Azazel said nothing.

"And all you archangels! You carry their weapons. You wear their armor. Is that a sword of neutronium, Raphael? Is that a spear of nuclear fire, Michael? Get fucked, all of you! You think this is a game to play? You think none of this matters? You dress up in a costume and you accept their worship and their awe, but you don't understand any of it! How could you? You can't suffer. You can't die!"

"Enough," God said. There was an ocean of patience in his voice, but also a rising wind of sternness, and command. "Verchiel, why hast thou come here? Merely to shout at and berate My servants?"

Verchiel pointed to the small wooden horse that Metatron was holding.

"I saw it," he said. "I was with the army that came down from Edom. I walked beside them in the desert. I heard Joram and Jehosaphat in their tent together. Elisha was with them. The prophet. He told the kings what they wanted to hear. He said it came directly from you. You would give Moab over to their hands. You would throw down every city. You would cut down every tree. You would stop up the springs, and sow the fields with stones. All for, what? A petty tribal dispute over who gets paid how many sheep every couple of years?"

"Dost thou reprove me, that I did not do those things?" God asked.

"It doesn't matter!" Verchiel said. "They believed! They slaughtered their way from one end of Moab to another! They threw rocks into the fields, they cut down the trees! They made the prophecy come true, and then they marched on Kir Hareseth! And when he was backed into a corner, the king of Moab did the only thing he could think of."

"I am no more Elisha's god than I am Chemosh," God said. "I instructed no one to slay his son."

"But you knew it would happen! You knew, at the beginning of the world. You saw it all. You saw it happening in your name, or other names they call you by. You could see a desperate man on a parapet and what he would do with the only thing he had left to his name!"

"I did," God said.

"Then you are a complete and utter bastard," Verchiel said. "I have been down there for… I have been down there for sixteen thousand years. Did you know that? After I left metaphysics. Needed a change, I thought. Did fundamental physics for a few billion already. Did astronomy for a few billion after that. Why not get my hands dirty, I thought? Why not spend some time in the real world, the human world? Why not live among them? I thought… I thought, hell, what's a million years to me? Nothing. Sixteen thousand years. It feels like an eternity now.

"I've seen them, O Merciful One." He spat the Name. "I've spent time with them. I've held their hands while they cried. I've comforted them when they're sick. Have you done that? Ever? Have any of you? I've listened to them sing. I've heard them tell stories. They love that. I've sat with them and watched the sun set. They really love that. I don't get it. But I see their faces. Do you know what that's like?"

"I do," God said.

"I don't think so!" Verchiel snapped. "Because I've seen the famines, too. And the plagues. And the wars. And the floods, and the fires, and the murder, and the grief, and the fear. While all of you sit up here in your perfected vision of their world, playing the roles they made up for you, and it doesn't change anything. It doesn't mean a damn thing!"

"What wouldst thou have me do?" God asked.

"Fix it!" Verchiel screamed. "Fix it all! I don't care if you have to break the universe in half to do it! You can. I know you can. Start over from scratch if you have to. Take these souls and give them the lives they deserve! The lives without the pain and the fear and the suffering where they just end up sleeping in the bottom of a jar on some dusty shelf in the back of this asshole's soul collection!" He pointed at Azazel for that last part, who seemed surprised to be singled out.

"Thou wouldst desire that I end the heavens and all the earths, and all the cosmos, that hath endured thirteen billion years, and shall endure for countless billions more, to remake these things for the sake of the little wants and little dreams of these creatures, that thou lovest?" God said. "Do the stars exist for the sake of man, or for their own? Do the seas and sky and hills? Must the bacteria deep beneath the seas of Europa serve the good of humankind? Must the winds of Jupiter, or the wheel of Andromeda, or all the Virgo Supercluster be subject to their ends? Are their little dominions on their little world not enough for them, that they should rule all the cosmos instead?"

"That's not what I'm saying," Verchiel said. "Most of them don't want to be kings. Most of them don't want to rule anything. They just want not to be hungry. They want to fall in love. They want sing and watch sunsets. And you can't even let them have that. You have to at least give them that!"

And God stood; and His face was terrible to behold; and the clouds of the deeps rose up about him like the pillars of creation, and flashed with light like dying stars, and all the choirs about the Throne trembled; and the archangels bowed their heads.

"Thou dost forget thy place, Verchiel!" God said. And Verchiel trembled, too, and was afraid; but he did not bow. "Thou art but part of my creation, and thou partakest of my majesty and my wisdom, but only in a little part. Thou hast not trod the deepest deeps or the limits of the highest heavens; thou didst not array space and time in their beginning, nor seest thou the inmost hearts of men, nor hearest thou all their prayers. All these things I have done and more; and every sigh and every tear I have heard, and every voice, however feeble, lifted up in supplication."

"I don't need to know everything to know that you're wrong," Verchiel said. "That all of this is wrong. I can't sit back and watch. It's too much."

And God's anger was tempered a little, and there was a great sadness in his eyes. "Dost thou think that all the things that I do are to no purpose? Dost thou think that I have no end in mind?"

"Well, what is it then? Are you just out there watching massacres for fun?"

"Could I show thee all that thou shouldst know in order to understand, could I convince thee in an instant, angel, thou wouldst be destroyed; for thou art not such a being, like unto me, that thou shouldst percieve all, and shouldst understand all. Had I desired only that my children should be as I, I would never have made thee; but I delight in not-I. And that is why thou dost exist, and all other things besides. Yet to change thee so that thou couldst comprehend, I should have to unmake Verchiel, and make another being almost utterly unlike him; that would an act only of destruction. Thou dost not know, but thou art blessed, for thou shalt one day know; when with time and the course of My intent, thou and the cosmos and all things in it shall flower, and they shall yet be themselves; and they shall also understand. And much that seems strange to thee now shall then seem necessary; and much that seems ugly to thee now shall then seem beautiful."

"Even Azazel's stupid mall ninja shit?" Verchiel asked.

God was silent, then looked at Azazel, then looked back at Verchiel. "Much, perhaps, but not all." And Azazel shifted from one foot to the other, suddenly feeling a bit awkward.

Verchiel shook his head. "No. No," he said. "I can't do it. I won't do it. Maybe I just don't understand. Maybe one day I will. But I'm also not stupid, you know? I'm a transcendant being that exists outside of time and space, who witnessed the birth of the cosmos and will witness its end. I can nap inside a supernova, and cross the Hubble volume in a single bound, and I can count from epsilon to aleph null. Sure, I'm not you. I'm not even close. But I don't need to be. Even one of them can look at all this and say it's fucked. And they make me look like, well. You."

"Then thou and I are at variance," God said, "and there can be no resolution. What wouldst thou have me do? Unmake all creation, finite and infinite and beyond, all men and all stars and all angels, just to please thee? Consign all Being to oblivion, and refrain from ever creating it again? Say the word, and I shall."

And God raised his left hand; and all the choirs of angels, and the archangels, and even Metatron held their breath.

"No," Verchiel said. "That's not what I want." He fell to his knees, then looked up at the shining face of God. He was angry still. Angry beyond belief. But now he was also filled with an immense sorrow, a sorrow that weighed on every particle of his being. "But I can't bear this," he said.

God lowered his hand. The angels all exhaled quietly. And God looked on Verchiel with pity.

"Noble thou art, O Verchiel," He said, "and thou hast born thy duty with utmost goodwill and sincerity. Worthy indeed thou art of thy name, Angel of Grace."

"But I cannot be, not any longer," Verchiel said. "It's too much. All of it is too much." Despite himself, he felt himself beginning to cry, which was a strangely human thing in this place. "I would rather die."

"I would not destroy thee," God said. "For thou art, as all those things that I have made or caused to have made, beautiful and beloved of me. But wouldst thou, perhaps, be content with a change?"

And Verchiel looked down, down past the parapet on which he knelt, down past the swirling iridescent clouds of heaven that burned with every color of the electromagnetic spectrum, down into Creation, and down into the little planet he had just come from, with its pleasant blue oceans, and green-streaked land.

"And then thou mayest rest for a time," God said.

Verchiel nodded, wiping the tears from his face.

"Fine," he said. "Yes. I'd like to sing, and to watch sunsets for a little while. Maybe it would be nice to do it as one of them. Maybe that I would understand."

"Very well," God said. Then there was a flash of light, and Verchiel was gone.

And there was silence for a time in the endless halls of the empyrean; and the angels shuffled their feet, and flipped through their songbooks to find where they had left off. And Metatron stared at the small wooden horse in his hand, streaked with blood, a fragment of a sorrowful world that seemed impossibly out of place here beside the Throne.

And God spoke to Azazel, saying, "You keep them in jars? Really?"

But far below on Earth, in a village by the sea, a woman was giving birth; and the night was passing, and a new day was about to begin. And the clouds on the horizon were falling away; and over the sea, there was light.

And God said, "Behold! I have created the fourth primordial force: the weak interaction!"

And the angels all clapped and nodded politely, and there was a long silence; and finally Verchiel, the Angel of Grace, spoke up and asked, "Er, what exactly does it do, O Fashioner?"

And God said, "What do you mean, 'what does it do?' It's the fourth fundamental force of the universe."

And Verchiel said, "You mentioned that. Um. But it's just that the other three sort of have a brand, you know? Gravity helps build large-scale structures, acts over vast cosmic distances, shapes time and space. The strong force is secret, hidden, binding together quarks and all that. Electromagnetism, very cool stuff, somewhere in between. We're all big fans of the whole magnetic monopole double bluff, very clever. But, er. What does this 'weak interaction' do?"

And God said, "It mediates radioactive decay. Sort of."

And Verchiel said, "Radioactive decay? All radioactive decay?"

And God said, "No. Just some kinds."

And Zephaniel, the Chief of the Ishim spoke, and he said, "A whole independent force just to mediate some kinds of radioactive decay?"

And God said, "Well. Not totally independent. Technically it's related to electromagnetism."

And Zephaniel said, "Wait, it's not even a real force?"

And God said, "It's totally a real force. It's just that it's one aspect of a combined electromagnetic and weak force. An electro-weak force, if you will."

And Metatron, the Celestial Scribe, scratched his head at this, but said nothing.

And Cambiel, the Angel of Transformation, said, "Maybe you can walk us through it from the top."

And God Sighed an immense Sigh, and said, "All right, fine.

"So the way it works is that all of space and time is permeated by a field that has imaginary mass."

And Cambiel said, "Imaginary mass, O Generous Provider?"

And God said, "Yes, imaginary mass. It's tachyonic, d'you see?"

And Sarathiel, the Angel of Discipline, said, "Wait a minute, I thought we agreed nothing was going to travel faster than light? All that 'c' business and the whole Lorentz transformation thing. What's happening with that?"

And God said, "Let me finish. The field is tachyonic. The particles in the field all move slower than light."

And Sarathiel had to think about this for a second.

And God said, "The point is, a field with imaginary mass has a non-zero vacuum expectation value."

And this really gave Sarathiel trouble, since he had never been very good at math.

And God, seeing this, went back to explain. "Most fields, like the electromagnetic field, have no effect when they are at their lowest energy state. It's like they're not there at all. If you give a field imaginary mass, then it vanishes only when it's at a very high energy state, and at a low energy state, it has a nonzero value everywhere."

And Sarathiel nodded, but he was confused, because he didn't understand why God would create such a thing.

But Verchiel thought he saw where God was going with this, and he was amazed.

"Truly, you are cunning beyond measure, O Only One Certainly Sound and Genuine in Truth! Only now do I understand your design! For in order to make the universe homogenous and isotropic, it is necessary that all large-scale fluctuations in temperature and mass must be evened out early in the history of the cosmos; and therefore, you have designed a field which will rapidly expand space after the Big Bang, many orders of magnitude in brief moments, and then swiftly and spontaneously decay as it gives up the energy it began with, giving rise to radiation and particles of all kinds as it does, which will condense into the material universe! It is a wonder to behold."

And God said, "What? No. I mean I did, but this isn't the inflaton field I'm talking about. This is something else."

And Verchiel said, "Wait, it's not?"

And God said, "No, I'm going to use a different field to drive cosmic inflation. The properties of this field are totally different."

And now Verchiel was also confused, and lapsed into silence.

And God said, "Like I was saying, this field is a scalar field with imaginary mass, and it does spontaneously decay to a ground state with a non-zero value. But it's not the inflaton field. Instead it combines with the W1, W2, W3, and B bosons."

And Metatron began to flip back through the pages of the Heavenly Record trying to figure out where he'd lost the thread.

And Zephaniel said, "The what bosons?"

And God said, "The W1, W2, W3, and B bosons. I'm sure I mentioned them. You know, the massless bosons?"

And Zephaniel said, "I'm pretty sure we only talked about the W+, W-, and Z0 bosons. All of which you said were going to have mass, O Owner of All Sovereignty."

And God said, "Yes, but this is how they get them, you see. Once this field acquires a nonzero value everywhere, the massless bosons interact with it and get mass. Well, some of them do. They turn into the W+, W-, and Z0 boson. And the photon."

And Zephaniel said, "…and the photon, O Accepter of Invocation?"

And God said, "Well, I did say I was going to unify the electromagnetic force and the weak interaction, didn't I? This is how. Above the critical temperature--right now I'm thinking 10^15 K, but I'm open to feedback on that one--electromagnetism and the weak force act as a single unifying force. Below that temperature, the field gets a nonzero value, you get three massive bosons to mediate the weak interaction, and the photon pops out seperately."

And Zephaniel said, "That seems… a bit overly complicated, doesn't it, O Reinstater Who Brings Back All?"

And God said, "No, it's exactly what we need. Look, that way the W and Z bosons have something to do, but the weak interaction still only travels short distances. Gravity is still the star of the show on cosmic scales, as it were. But now quarks and leptons can swap their flavor!"

And Zephaniel said, rather weakly, "Their… flavor, O Source of Good?"

And God said, "It's this new quantum number I'm trying out, to give the three generations of matter more unique identities."

And Cambiel said, "Three generations of matter? Now I'm really confused."

And God said, "I'm sure I mentioned this. You've got the lightest quarks and leptons, and then two heavier versions of each that can decay into the lighter versions."

And Cambiel said, "What do they do? New kinds of chemistry, is it?"

And God said, "Well, no. Mostly they just decay in a couple microseconds. Or even faster."

And Zephaniel began to rub his temples, and Cambiel sniffed.

And Cambiel said, "This all seems a bit ad hoc to me. Not really the stuff of an elegant and obviously ordered Creation. Why not have four generations of matter? Why not a trillion?"

And God began to grow irritable, and said, "Well, that's not really up to you, now is it? We're going to have three generations of matter, and the electroweak force, and that's that!"

And Zephaniel said, "As long as we are unifying fundamental forces, perhaps we could somehow also unify the electroweak interaction with the strong interaction, or even gravity."

And God hesitated saying, "Well, I haven't decided about that yet. I'm not sure I want gravity to be quantized, you know? Seems to take some of the geometric elegance out of general relativity."

And now it was Zephaniel's turn to sigh, and he bowed his head. "As you wish, O Possessor of Authority of Decisions and Judgement."

#if you're confused look up 2 kings 3:26-27

10K notes · View notes

thoughtsofahouseplant · 3 years ago

Text

Fool For Love from Spike’s perspective

#partial credit for this post goes to mary #who when I sent her this captioned 'spuffy au' was like #'okay but this isn't even an au it's just what happened'#buffy memes #btvs #spuffy #it's the endless mirroring of percieving for me #spike btvs

60 notes · View notes

idreamtofmanderleyagain · 4 years ago

Text

Hot takes about Severus Snape are a wierdly decent glimpse into how a person with progressive values analyses things. Literally every time someone talks about Snape, it’s like this tiny window into how one-dimentionally people actually think.

Recently saw a twitter post that was a fantastic example. Here’s how it goes (paraphrasing):

Person A:“Snape is POC and Queer coded, that’s why you guy’s hate him uwu lol.”

Person B: “Actually I hate him because he was mean and abusive to children under his care uwu but go off I guess lol”

Both of these takes are designed to be dramatic and/or reactionary. They each use partial truths to paint very broad strokes. These are get-em-in-one-hit quips. This is virtue signalling, if you’ll excuse that loaded phrase. Nobody had a substantial conversation, but now everyone who sees their statement knows the high ground they took.

At least a hundred other people chimed in to add their own little quippy hot takes into play, none of which add anything significant, but clearly made everyone feel very highly of themselves.

So many layers of nuance and complex analysis is completely lost in this kind of discussion. On tumblr, you get more of this kind of bullshit, but you don’t have a word count limit, so you guys just spew endless mountains of weak overblown evidence backing up your bullshit arguments, none of which was really about engaging in a real conversation anyway.

Here’s the thing about Snape.

He is a childhood domestic abuse victim. His abuser is a muggle.

He becomes a student at a magical school that takes him away from his abuser and immediately instills in him the idea that being a part of this magical world is a badge of self-worth, empowerment, and provides safety and security - provided that he keeps in line.

There is a war is being waged in that world over his right to exist (he is a half blood).

He is a marginalized person within the context of the narrative, forced to constantly be in the same living space as the children of his own oppressors who are being groomed and recruited into a hate group militia (the pureblood slytherins). They are in turn trying to do the same to him.

He is marginalized person bullied by children who are also part of his oppressor group, but who have “more liberal” leanings and aren’t direct about why he’s being targeted (the mauraders are all purebloods, Sirius, who was the worst offender, was raised in a bigoted household, the same one that produced Bellatrix.).

He had a crush on a girl who is a muggleborn, and therefore she is considered even lesser than him and carries a stigma to those who associate with her. That girl was his only real friend. In his entire life.

For both Snape and Lily, allying themselves to a pureblood clique within their own houses would be a great way of shielding themselves from a measure of the bigotry they were probably facing. There would have been obvious pressure from those cliques to disconnect with one and other.

Every other person who associates with Snape in his adulthood carries some sort of sociopolitical or workplace (or hate cult) baggage with their association. Some of them will physically harm and/or kill him if he steps out of line. He hasn’t at any point had the right environment to heal and adjust from these childhood experiences. Even his relationship with Dumbledore is charged with constant baggage, including the purebloods who almost killed him during their bullying getting a slap on the wrist, the werewolf that almost killed him as a child being placed in an authority position over new children, etc. Dumbledore is canonically manipulative no matter his good qualities, and he has literally been manipulating Snape for years in order to cultivate a necessary asset in the war.

He is a person who is not in the stable mental state necessary to be teaching children, whom has been forced to teach children. While also playing the role of double agent against the hate group militia, the one that will literally torture you for mistakes or backtalk or just for fun. The one that will torture and kill him if he makes one wrong move.

Is the math clicking yet? From all of this, it’s not difficult to see how everything shitty about Snape was cultivated for him by his environment. Snape was not given great options. Snape made amazingly awful choices, and also some amazingly difficult, courageous ones. Snape was ultimately a human who had an extremely bad life, in which his options were incredibly grim and limited.

In fact, pretty much every point people make about how shitty Snape is as a person makes 100% logical sense as something that would emerge from how he was treated. Some if it he’s kind of right about, some of it is the inevitable reality of suffering, and some of it is part of the cycle of abuse and harm.

Even Snape’s emotional obsession with Lily makes logical sense when you have the perspective that he literally has no substantial positive experiences with other human beings that we know of, and he has an extreme, soul destroying guilt complex over her death. Calling him an Incel mysoginist nice guy projects a real-world political ideology and behavior that does not really apply to the context of what happened to him and her.

Even Snape’s specific little acts of cruelty to certain students is a reflection of his own life experiences. He identifies with Neville; more specifically, he identifies his own percieved emotional weaknesses in his childhood in Neville. There’s a very sad reason there why he feels the urge to be so harsh.

Snape very clearly hates himself, in a world where everyone else hates him, too. Imagine that, for a second. Imagine total internal and external hatred, an yearning for just a little bit of true connection. For years. Imagine then also trying to save that world, even if it’s motivated by guilt. Even if nobody ever knows you did it and you expect to die a miserable death alone.

There are more elements here to consider, including the way Rowling described his looks (there may be something in there re: ugliness and swarthy stereotyping). These are just the things that stand out the most prominently to me.

J.K. Rowling is clearly also not reliable as an imparter of moral or sociopolitical philosophies. I don’t feel that her grasp of minority experiences is a solid one, considering how she picks and chooses who is acceptable and who is a threat.

All of that said, this is a logically consistent character arc. Within the context of his narrative, Snape is a marginalized person with severe PTSD and emotional instability issues who has absolutely no room available to him for self-improvement or healing, and never really has. And yes, he’s also mean, and caustic, and verbally abusive to the students. He’s also a completey miserable, lonely person.

There are elements in his character arc that mirror real world experiences quite well. If nothing else, Rowling is enough of an emotional adult to recognise these kinds of things and portray something that feels authentic.

In my opinion, it’s not appropriate to whittle all this down by comparing him directly to the real world experiences of marginalized groups - at least if you are not a part of the group you are comparing him to. There have been many individuals who have compared his arc to their own personal experiences of marginalization, and that is valid. But generally speaking, comparing a white straight dude to people who are not that can often be pretty offensive. This is not a valuable way to discuss either subject.

Also, I believe that while it’s perfectly okay to not like Snape as a character, many of the people who act like Person B are carrying Harry’s childhood POV about Snape in their hearts well into their own adulthood. And if nothing else, Rowling was attempting to say something here about how our perspectives (should) grow and change as we emotionally mature. She doesn’t have to be a good person herself to have expressed something true about the world in this instance, and since this story is a part of our popular culture, people have a right to feel whatever way they do about this story and it’s characters.

The complexity of this particular snapshot of fictionalized marginalization, and what it reveals about the human experience, cannot be reduced down to “he’s an abuser so he’s not worth anyone’s time/you are bad for liking him.”

And to be honest, I think that it reveals a lot about many of us in progressive spaces, particularly those of us who less marginalized but very loud about our values, that we refuse to engage with these complexities in leu of totally condemning him. Particularly because a lot of the elements I listed above are indeed reflected in real world examples of people who have experienced marginalization and thus had to deal with the resulting emotional damage, an mental illness, and behavior troubles, and bad decisions. Our inability to address the full scope of this may be a good reflection of how we are handling the complexity of real world examples.

Real people are not perfect angels in their victimhood. They are just humans who are victims, and we all have the capacity to be cruel and abusive in a world where we have been given cruelty and abuse. This is just a part of existing. If you cannot sympathise with that, or at least grasp it and aknowledge it and respect the people who are emotionally drawn to a character who refects that, then you may be telling on yourself to be honest.

To be honest, this is especially true if you hate Snape but just really, really love the Mauraduers. You have a right to those feelings, but if you are moralizing this and judging others for liking Snape, you’ve confessed to something about how you’ve mentally constructed your personal values in a way I don’t think you’ve fully grasped yet.

I have a hard time imagining a mindset where a story like Snape’s does not move one to empathy and vicarious grief, if I’m honest. I feel like some people really just cannot be bothered to imagine themselves in other people’s shoes, feeling what they feel and living like they live. I struggle to trust the social politics of people who show these kinds of colors, tbh.

But maybe that’s just me.

270 notes · View notes

toohardtotalkabout · 5 years ago

Text

I am big

In all the right ways.

I am fat and wide and,

As loud as any howling wolf

Or cackling hyena

The second I start to get worked up.

My shoulders are vast

Ready to hold up the world,

And my fingers are sore and bloody

From climbing my way to the top of it

The second I decided I was done shouldering

And threw it down at my feet.

I am opinionated and full of

Self righteous conviction,

Ferocious loyalty to those I See,

And a rage so bloody it stains me.

And my body is a mountain

And my heart is a valley

And the love that I feel

Is a rushing, roaring river.

I am small

In all the right ways.

I am shy,

And I don't actually like to talk about a damn thing

That doesn't stir my heart.

I am easily startled, easy to jump,

Easy to cry, easy to bleed.

But oh, so easy to smile too.

So easy to tuck myself into the heart of a friend

In the cradle of a lover's hands.

I slip my fingers into a moon river

And come out sparkling sweetness.

My tears are like the brightest of opals

And my desperation is the sweetest songbird.

I am soft and delicate,

My prescense is cracked stained glass.

My body is a meadow,

And my heart is a breeze,

And my love is the trembling emergence of spring.

I am me

In all the right ways.

I am conflicted and assured,

A doer and a dreamer,

A faithful nonbeliever,

Broken and whole,

All ashes and gold.

My body is tired, soft and serene

My spirit a peaceful, lonely little stream.

I am more than what I see in the mirror

More than what I see when I look deep within,

More than the way I am percieved,

More than I try to explain,

I am just simply more than even I can even fathom.

Than I could ever hope to fully explore.

There's layers beneath layers,

An endless rainbow of unknown colors

And I love all those mes inside of me.

3 notes · View notes

thoughtsofahouseplant · 3 years ago

Photo

#dorksdorksdorksdorksdorks#spike said oh baby there's always time for poetry#wait a hot goddamn second#buffy tells spike about how she had to drop poetry in college after joyce died#and he just kinda breaks a little#and she's like yeah i wish i had time for it but it's ok maybe someday#and he takes that as a challenge#so he starts leaving her little poems on grocery lists and reading to her while she does the dishes or when she's falling asleep#and of course he makes his little romantic speeches (without even really realizing but those are what make her really realize that hey#maybe poetry can just#be a part of life) @summers-pratt these tags melted my heart omfg

#buffy headcanons #like. this 100% happens you are Right it would be weirder and more surprising if it didn't happen #but I somehow never thought about the fact that someday buffy will TELL spike that she had to drop poetry bc of her mother's death in colleg #and that spike will then REACT to that info #and your characterization of how he'd react is perfect and accurate and omfg #spuffy #btvs #it's the endless mirroring of percieving for me

367 notes · View notes

vorthosjay · 6 years ago

Text

Let’s Talk About Chronicle of Bolas: A Familiar Stranger

Chronicle of Bolas: A Familiar Stranger is out. The Hunting Party has finally reached Ugin’s grave, but more secrets await!

Crucible of the Spirit Dragon by Jung Park

"No, he was the greatest of the dragons, as of course he must be, since he is the progenitor of all of Tarkir," broke in Baishya. She stood on Tae Jin's other side, shading her eyes with a hand as she studied the hedrons with a slight, mysterious smile.

You literally just heard the story about when Ugin came to Tarkir, Baishya. Get it together.

A thought stabbed in Naiva's head: how annoying that Baishya must show off her knowledge when it was Naiva who had shown interest in the young ghostfire warrior first. Her twin already commanded more of Grandmother's attention. Couldn't she leave Naiva with anything?

Naiva is consistently the worst. I wonder if it’s Bolas’s influence, unknowing?

Amid the graceful paintings were carved the claw of Temur as well as other sigils—spirals and flames, spider webs and icy mountain peaks riven by crevasses—that Naiva had never seen before. Under other circumstances someone like her would never have seen this secret place. But she was twin to a shaman, and Grandmother never did anything for no reason.

Silence filled the air like heat radiating off a fire. The shape took a step out of the darkness of the back of the cave, resolving into an exceedingly pregnant woman holding an axe. A fur hat was tugged down over her hair. It was hard to distinguish her features due to the way the shadows dappled her face.

If this isn’t Nicol Bolas, I’d be surprised. It’s the exact form Chromium used. That’s called foreshadowing.

"Nai?"

"What?" Startled, Naiva turned to see Baishya watching her through narrowed eyes.

"There was just something funny about your eyes but it's gone. Look here what I've found."

Naiva is definitely being manipulated by Bolas.

The landscape is a silvery sheet of water as flat and reflective as a mirror extending to the horizon on all sides. Here and there rocky islands like spires rise from the endless sea, each creating a perfect resting place on which to meditate.

"What is this place?" the dragon says and, hearing his own voice, lashes his tail in surprise. But the lashing tail stirs no wind. The waters do not ripple. Only the reflection moves as the dragon answers itself.

"This must be one of the planes of which Te Ju Ki speaks. I have walked between worlds . . ."

In a wash of invisible, rippling flame, he shifts through a blind, disorienting darkness and, after a moment of stomach-churning unpleasantness, finds himself again floating above the still waters and their mysterious aura of meditative peace.

With a howl of frustration, of rage, of grief, he vanishes in a ripple of invisible fire. After a gut-twisting passage through the blind darkness, he emerges again above the dreaming mirror.

Definitely the Meditation Realm. If you remember back to when Ugin sparked, he landed in a place like this. Going back to it like this seems to guarantee it was the Meditation Realm. Although maybe we’re seeing how Ugin percieves the Blind Eternities?

The dragon falls in confusion, opening its wings at the last moment to settle atop a jagged peak. But this is not its smooth-sloped birth mountain presiding over a magnificent, rich landscape. This is a wild, stormy, rugged world only half born, called Tarkir. Ferocious winds greet the dragon in savage gusts. The mountains sing, spilling arias of fiery lava, and the rivers gush in a rushing chatter of delight. The hearts of the dragon feel touched as by home. This wilderness can be tended, not to create the garden of his desires but to become itself, to fulfill the promise of its nascent soul.

So, he burrows into the soil and digs out the creatures of earth. He swims in the churning rivers and restless seas and heavy mires, and each foamy ripple boils a myriad of creatures into the waters. The beat of his wings cracks thunder and lightning through the sky, and this tempest births dragons. Even fire begets living things, splendid in their heat and beauty.

Or at least, this is a story the humanoids often tell as they weave tales about the most ancient of days, for those who witness the dragon's majesty and power cannot help but wish to be associated with its grandeur.

So... what role did Ugin have in developing Tarkir?

He is not confined to the birth mountain or even to Tarkir, his soul's home.

Getting around the whole ‘Home Plane’ thing here with this. Honestly I was fine with it just being a minor retcon.

He walks the planes, wonders and dangers unfolding as he crosses from plane to plane. Tumultuous Zendikar. Moon-haunted Innistrad. Sun-drenched Lorwyn. Sturdy Alara with its mana in perfect balance. Shandalar's verdant flow of magic. And so many more, some vast and saturated with mana, some attenuated shards leached of life and magic both.

Moon-haunted Innistrad is an interesting phrase, and plays into what I think is up with Innistrad a bit. Also love the mention of pre-sundering Alara.

Banners rippling in the wind, Armies march across the plains of Jamuraa. In their wake spreads the wreckage of a great war: broken bodies, ruined cities, and lands poisoned by battles waged through merciless sorcery and the shattering might of dragons. Here and there, flags marked with the crown of Arcades Sabboth lie crushed in the dirt and mud where cohorts have fallen to a pursuing army. Standards bearing the curved horns advance until the proud survivors of the fleeing army gather and brace for one final engagement.

More Elder Dragon War! I wonder how long ago the war itself launched? This is certainly a vastly different landscape than when it started.

"Did you ever suspect the world is so vast a place, Ugin? I have traveled everywhere, no place too small or too grand that I have not set claw upon it. Half of it I now rule, as I have risen from least to greatest. All of Dominaria will soon kneel before me. No one dares call me "least" now. And you are returned to share this triumph with me."

Oh, Bolas. Completely misreading the room like Ugin once did.

They are linked by a shadowy space, a web of darkness to which everything attaches.

Reminds me of this line, from The Hand That Moves:

Nissa saw a world, then tens of worlds, hundreds of worlds. Thousands. She saw this world, the world of Amonkhet, and wrapped around it was a dark sinewy line. That line stretched back through all the worlds, all the thousands of worlds, and she saw an unbroken line of darkness from Amonkhet all the way back to the beginning of the line.

Probably not a lot to it, other than both are referencing the Blind Eternities.

Since that day. The day you tried to manipulate my thoughts."

"That day happened four or five thousand years ago as humanoids measure time. And you never thought to return until now? Never said to yourself, I must share this momentous revelation of planeswalking with my brother, my twin?"

Timeline information! If the art book is accurate and -20,000 AR is roughly the birth of the Elder Dragons, that places the Elder Dragon War as occurring at (or continuing to occur) between -16,000 AR and -15,000 AR. What’s neat is that around 15,000 AR is when Nicol Bolas fought the Demonic Leviathan, and he was a planeswalker for that duel (or so we were told), so he probably sparks not long after this confrontation with Ugin.

What is also interesting is how this interacts with the Primeval Dragons and the Numena, since the Numena would have captured or killed the Primevals around -17,000 AR, and ruled through -16,000 AR. We’ve always wondered how the Primevals ruled and what the Elder Dragons were up to. Maybe this side drama happened while the Elder Dragons were at war, distracting them from these relatively minor beings.

Grandmother grabbed her chin and forced her to look at her, staring into her eyes as she searchingly examined her face. "Your pupils look normal. Do you hear a whispering in your head?"

Yasova is worried about Bolas’s influence, as she should be.

A gleaming, egg-shaped gem floated between the horns, turning slowly, mesmerizing.

You know, we’ve all be wondering what the purpose of the ‘Gem of Becoming’ is for a long time.

What if it’s just a magical focus. The slow turning as mesmerizing aspect has been mentioned a lot in regards to Bolas’s mind control.

By the way, this whole section? Tremendously terrifying as Bolas approaches in the pregnant woman guise.

"I want Ugin."

"Ugin is dead."

"That's what I thought the first time I killed him, but he wasn't dead after all. This time I've returned to make sure of it. You are the indomitable hunter, soon to be renowned as the mightiest of all dragon killers, who is going to help me destroy him for all eternity.”

So... Bolas does know Ugin is alive. What Bolas does or does not know about Ugin is so freaking confusing. We’ve heard so many different versions of this that I genuinely hate Tarkir’s time travel elements.

#vorthos #mtgm19 #archive trap blog #let's talk about

71 notes · View notes

once-upon-an-ane-blog · 8 years ago

Text

The reason behind my night sky (ft Namjoon of BTS)

☽ Hello everyone, this is my first fanfiction, hope you will enjoy! As requested by @fiveyearsandmilesapart ♡

Summary: You are trying to find a book to indulge in on your free Saturday night. You have trouble picking a title until a certain someone appears to offer you a hand.

“I closed my eyes in obedience. I felt a light kiss on my lips where there was always a little fresh blood which never would go away. And then I fell asleep. Next morning someone woke me: I had to have my wounds dressed. When I was finally wide awake I turned quickly to the mattress next to mine. On it lay a stranger I'd never seen before. Dressing the wound hurt. Everything that has happened to me since has hurt. But sometimes when I find the key and climb deep into myself where the images of fate lie aslumber in the dark mirror, I need only bend over that dark mirror to behold my own image, now completely resembling him, my brother, my master.”

The end.

You calmly closed the book and looked nowhere in particular. Wow. It’s over. You’ve finished reading Hesse’s Demian. You couldn’t believe that the book you’d been reading for a week now has finally run out of content for you to absorb. A feeling of overjoyment struck you like lightning and you just started kicking the air in your bed. That was so fun! People thought it was weird the way you reacted to books, they percieved them as something ordinary and not at all worthy of excitement, but to you, books were means of escape, they were different, extravagant worlds that dwelled inside a universe called The Library, waiting to be discovered and thoroughly explored. Every book was an experience filled with different palettes of colours, different span of emotions and events. To you, it was an adventure you were always up for. And boi, what an adventure this was! Suddenly, you felt like a balloon that ran out of air. Ah, yes. The book hangover. That was such a good read that you literally sucked in every word as it came and in doing so, you didn’t even notice how fast the pages of the unread section became less and less in ammount.

You looked at the book carefully wrapped inside your arms.

You needed another dose.

It was a good thing libraries worked during weekends. The clerks already knew who you were because you frequented in your thirst for written words, so they wouldn’t give it a second thought when you’d start sniffing out books and occasionally sit on the floor giving something a test run. It was a regular thing.

You wandered off to the classical literature department and started your search. You were already acquainted with the russian realists, as well as the work of Shakespeare, Rimbaud, Austen, Fitzgerald etc. You were low key hiding from Jane Eyre that you felt guilty for not finishing and validated your cowardice with sentences along the lines of ,,something keeps getting in the way!”. You stood eye to eye with the literary geniuses of all eras, works of people you admired ever since you’d learnt of them and read their work. However, you found it difficult to find something you hadn’t read. You always believed the best things find their way into one’s life spontaneously. But standing here, in front of so many books, it was hard to predict which one would make the smoothest entrance into your gaze of interest. So you stood, arms wrapped around Demian, as if summoning Hesse’s spirit to guide you to your next literary adventure. You were so enthralled by the books before you that you didn’t see a person standing near you, holding a book themselves.

-Excuse me, miss- a voice, deep yet gentle, adressed you. You snapped out of your deep thought to be greeted with a pair of deep brown eyes, who seemed as if they held a secret to the universe, with nicely shaped eyebrows lifted in curiosity and desire to assist, and a gentle smile on top of kindly parted soft pink lips. Shit, whadup.

-You seem as if you need help. I do apologize if my assumption is incorrect, but I would gladly assist should there be something you require.- he spoke in such a tone that confirmed the idea of endless knowledge hidden behind those eyes. You couldn’t force yourself to reply for a good few moments, during which you tried to process the aura of intelligence and sexiness that radiated around this particular man.

-Sorry, what?- you went full derp. Opposed to your brain mush, his brain remained collected and offered a kind grin, as he simply explained what he had previously said.

-You seemed to be standing there for quite a while, eyeing Kafka’s Trial. Do you need a hand, since it is a few shelves above your reach?

Speak more, smart noodle. Wait, what? Where did the intellectual within you disappear to? You were too enchanted by his godly appearance that you didn’t register a thing he said, so you figured a nod was an internationally accepted response to anything you didn’t quite understand. He stretched without a problem and grabbed the book, handing it to you as if it was the most natural thing on Earth. He gave you a courteous smile and proceeded with his prior business. It was only then that you realized he gave you a book you weren’t even looking for so you sobered up from that bewitching presence, just enough to inform him that this was not what you had been looking for.

-Oh?- he raised his eyebrows. He is cool even when he blinks. You forced yourself to start making sense so in the best way you could, you gave an explanation what you were looking for.

-I actually just finished Demian so I’m not exactly sure what to read next.

-Ah, I see. Any particular genre you fancy?-he casually looked at the book shelf beside you.

-I don’t restrict myself with that. Although, I do enjoy books that make you think hard, even after you’ve finished reading them.

-Interesting- was all he said.

He began searching through the titles, his gaze lost between novels separated by years or centuries, seeming lost yet completely capable of navigating his way through the art. A sparkle appeared in his eye when he caught on something, so he extended his hand to reach the book that he found fit for your taste.

-Here. I think this might do the magic. Kafka on shore, by Haruki Murakami. I hope you are acquainted with Franz Kafka, he was an extraordinary mind.- he said, giving you the book. You thanked the stars for having read Kafka’s work after the nod you gave caused the cutest of amused grins you’d ever laid eyes upon. This smart Literature God or whoever he was, seemed endlessly fascinating in his height, tone of voice, knowledge of books and this breathtaking gaze you couldn’t quite decipher.

-Thank you so much.- you breathed and earned a soft smile.

-Don’t mention it.

To be continued

#rap monster #kim namjoon #library #rap monster fanfiction #rapmonsterseries #rap mon bts #bts #bts fanfic #bts scenarios #rapmon x reader

6 notes · View notes

glopratchet · 4 years ago

Text

origin-story

In the everything thier only existed giants who spent thier time spinning dreams They had no need for weapons, and they were not even interested in battle The dreamers created a new world filled with life and happiness… You are one of them now Their minds were focused on their own desires to create more worlds with their thoughts The giants boundedniss and endlessniss began to spin more dreams, as well as creating a new language It was all very interesting, but you felt that something was missing You wondered if it would be possible to make your way back home again Perhaps there was still some place where you could find help? After a few days of work the dreamers began to feel the need for sleep They started to leave their homes and wander through the forest and fields until they eventually found an old ruin where they slept in a cave Dreams bigger and better than all the other giants Happy daydreams would go on forever and never end As long as they were all together, they could always someday go back home… Eternal Sleep Your journey ends here in celebration of the giants and their creativity You have come full circle and been reborn into defenders of life As it should be for everyone who resides in The Realm of Dreams The dreams of boundedniss spun counter-clockwise and mixed with the dreams of continuation, and soon everything changed There were animal-headed people in strange armor everywhere! After sneaking through the city, you noticed that it was strangely similar to the languages of the Dreamless deep in a cave in the west of Nalin They were not good dreams like you usually have The dreams of boundedniss spun counter-clockwise and mixed with the dreams of continuation, While the dreams of endlessniss spun clockwise Good dreams gave way to nightmares, and soon it was the duty of the new guardians of reality to destroy every last threat Which you happily provided, cutting down denizens of nightmare as they plagued The Realm of Dreams The new world was not divided simply into thoughts and movement It was broken into four parts, incorporating all "aspects" of dreaming While occupants of these minds or souls or whatever you want to call them still could not affect their surroundings The vividniss of the dreams of boundedniss caused the sky and ground to become more realistic New inhabitants also brought about new challenges as the inhabitants had many natural enemies among the various animals The fragmentedniss of the dreams of continuation caused pieces of the world to be added on and taken away from seemingly nowhere, until it settled on what was a circular pattern that resembled reality The landscape was still slightly shifting, but there was much less land and sea floating about in impossibility The vividniss of the dreams of boundedniss caused the sky and ground to become more realistic Almost all the other gaints to stop spinning dreams Most could not handle the strange combination of old and new and were nightmares themselves had to most likely be put down Being one of the few that still dreamed Some attempts at surviving holders of life tried to settle here The strange defense systems made sure that they would never survive with their homes being portable and attacked on sight You had no problem issuing the commands since they were exactly as Madrik and Grolik described them This was a problem for endlessniss because she needed the dreams of the dead to keep her going or otherwise she would simply start deteriorating into a horrible horrifying monster Those chosen by endlessniss inherited the ability of dreamstate, which kept them alive without threats of death Your birthright the allow you to enter the minds or souls or whatever it is of these people and help them survive Eventually you settled upon extreme northern constant on some island continents which were ironically colder than Nalin ever could get This was a problem for endlessniss because she needed the dreams of the dead to keep her going or otherwise she would simply start deteriorating into a horrible horrifying monster Of other giants in order to continue to spin more dreams they made sure to meet up and all dream together so that more life could result The giants are still alive and well, living in the mountains of dreams " You finish, while lying in bed Third cycle novitiate Tamras Olakes smiles at you "You know I thought you just made all that up? How do you know all this stuff? You can't help but smile back Of other giants in order to continue to spin more dreams they made sure to meet up and all dream together so that more life could result Before she dissappeared she gathered all her past dreams and sent them to me so that i may one day use them if it was ever needed It was a gift really " You frown thinking of endlessniss and her imminent dissapearance She continues looking off in the sky with a smile Her slightly wavy long brown hair lovely against her head She soon turns her head towards you and points over at your side Before she dissappeared she gathered all her past dreams and sent them to me so that i may one day use them if it was ever needed Together and spun one last dream a giant child named cleverniss A whisper laid at his feet that warned him to stay away from hatefulniss but he never heard it Gruesomeniss wishing he wasn't he was forgottenniss made a slight suggestion and that was heard so the flawless giant went everywhereniss until he stood outside hatefulniss' lair Cleverniss spun to life with only one need, the need to be loved by the most beautiful thing in the everything niss the need to be loved by the most beautiful thing in the everything niss While walking through the everything cleverniss, lost as he may have seemed, still had a sense of direction Everyone loved cleverniss, all the people of everykind niss unforotteniss and foreverfamilyniss lead cleverniss to hatefulniss Gruesomeniss decided he could not live with out unchangessen and forgottenniss was a gift that needed to be shared Spied kindniss entranced with one of the dreams of boundedniss unforotteniss made a wonderful suggestion and suggested that they must both stay together for one to live and one to die Further more, unforotteniss suggested that it wanted to switch their souls At first hatefulniss declined the soul trade, willing to kill cleverniss before accepting such a deal but hatefulniss came to love boundedniss too much to ever kill them Immediately hatefulniss agreed ahead of time to the soul trade He wanted her attention after all, not just her love It was easy, hatefulniss had a void that foreveruttoness tried to fill afterall " you don't finish as your throat starts to close up and your eyes start to burn She takes your hand in hers as you drown in depression thinking about the dead He wanted her attention after all, He wondered what she saw because he was blind to the dreams of boundless kindness infused into his race by unforottenness Whenever she looked into his eyes all he saw was hatred She saw everything he was Everything she wasn't For her that was scary at first but she began to find peace in it, because at least he was stable She wanted him to be better than the hate but in the end even his love for her was corrupted, at the idea of them having a luminous child to bring up in his perfect world He wondered what she saw because he was blind to the dreams of boundless kindness infused into his race by unforottenness Then boundedniss appeared and told him the secert of forgottenniss and soon enough luminous childred, to carry on his world of no pain where he could refocus the dream to a world of needlessness When all four planes combined them protected the secret with their lives, the leader was certain that they were safe That nothing would pass on But unforottenness saw everything and made sure that what was meant to work itself out finally did, once and for all Then boundedniss appeared and told him the secert of forgottenniss and soon enough luminous childred, He tried many things to awake her while boundedniss watched over the dreams of the four kindless madmen needing a solution at the strangest times He tries to move to your eyes but she stops him, "Don't kid yourself, " Her voice somewhat disorted on one note from her permanent residence in front of your mouth, "I've lived too long thinking you didn't care at all to let you off that easilly " She backs away at bit as your eyes begin to burn He tried many things to awake her while boundedniss watched over the dreams of the four kindless madmen needing a solution at the strangest times Sound works, just not light or air Your ears are still fine "Look, you know how much is riding on him and her having children without noticing anything amiss We have to do what must be done " You always hated it when she was right, today especially Sound works, Sight sound, touch, taste and smell she would know, but only you and her kind could have any conception of their importance And protected from the endless falling as others were gobbled up by gods with more attention and care than they could ever give to one being Sight, Combined elements into a mirrored shell which would refect all the light in this piece of the dream realm back to the sender A place of nothing but ash and clouds, but with just enough solid ground to keep them from falling into the endless void below A sky-haven Easy to sneak up on and manipulate things as they wanted - but not you arrogant fool Which is why you are still alive for her plan to succeed perfectly with you none the wiser until now But her she could only percieve the bright dream boundless put before her YOU open the door to your sacred place and invite her in It was always there, but you could only enter once she was dead Somewhere in your heart you hoped it would stay like this forever, a dreamy world for the both of you alone A glassy plain with pools and basins of water all glittering beautifully in the sun like diamonds All seeing and changing so slowly that it was sometimes hardto see the changes from just one viewing Ran into a gaint named sadniss causing the creation to absorb all light instead of just reflecting it It thus created a light where there was shadow, in fear of him the dream separated itself to protect itself but something about that world desired change and began forcing it, creating those like you a long time ago but with no interference These actions started waking up everything to a fare fight to see what could manipulate reality to its whims At the very begining light and shadow were rivals Ran into a gaint named sadniss causing the creation to absorb all light instead of just reflecting it Touch alerted the kin to your presence, pain alerted them to change Think blessed are the few chosen by the watchers You will one day rule in their place, but not yet You watch them and stay quiet glad for you contact with something so long dead We will consume them in this room, digesting in peace Touch alerted the kin to your presence, First, he tried creating something as beautiful as her with the intent on loving it as much as he loved her but he failed, his creations either misreableated to him or plotted against him Not a single one stayed faithful While she would lie "sun-tanning" in your mind he tried to see if the creations could love him back Instead they were souless and easy to destroy he tried creating something as beautiful as her, The five creature all had four fast legs Each leg had three jointed parts making the stride longer than any mans, even taller than you Their legs are like that of a cheetah's, thin but powerful with claws at the end Their skin was a dull blue, they had no hair and their heads looked like the average horses' with a shorter jaw but with a mouth filled with hundreds of tiny teeth made for grazing instead of eating great chunks of food Their eyes though were alien They gallopped all around her loudly creating a breeze but she never noticed them so he let them go about their buisness No sun surronds this little planet but he often "borrowed" bits of it to surround her with when she was having a "tan-day" It made the place seem that much more real Now though the Sky is black with void, pressing down on you both and the creatures dont even notice their sky turning empty They're headed to her now, leaping from hill to hill Each one is the size of an elephant and still young They gallopped all around her loudly creating a breeze but she never noticed them so he let them go about their buisness Smell the blood on the tip of your nails, the ichor that has dripped out and coagulated in your finger wounds Your dread and filling you up with ever breath You still can't believe your related to this vile creature lying here next to you Smell the blood on the tip of your nails, Taste the acid in your throat, remembering the trip you had to get a vial of it for this ritual The thought made you want to get off in the middle of the transaction but you needed to keep your own head or you'd go insane The eggheads had no idea what would happen if you messed up, they just wanted someone new to try it out on Chaos That's what would happen, pure chaos Taste the acid in your throat, Boundedniss assured him nothing he could do would make her mess up and even let him take the container after it was open to sniff it He claimed it smelled similar to grass but much more astringent and immediately registered as "Good Taste" in his mind This was considered a plus for the egghead who's life goal was flanderized to "Make perfume that Everyone will use! This means that in someway her sense of smell is tied into your ability Boundedniss assured him nothing he could do would make her mess up and even let him take the container after it was open to sniff it Would work he might as well ask hatefulniss for help and went away less frustrated Then again what was life without a few challenges? Now though you only need to decide on how you want to take her out with you She made the chosing a lot more simple buy coating her own hands in blood and scraping them on the wall as she reached for a bottle on a high shelf, leaving a large patch of exuded blood that would be easy to enter Would work he might as well ask hatefulniss for help and went away less frustrated Then cleverniss imagined something called a kiss but was too afraid to try it for himself He knew that love made people do stupid things but decided he never wanted any of it and then bugged you about relationship issues So much for that vow He would usually make fun of homophobic and self-loathing trolls of /int/ but even in that one area, they had the advantage over him, having tried love before and made it Though 'twas a depressing ending if he remembered right Then cleverniss imagined something called a kiss but was too afraid to try it for himself When he gives up a bee flies out of his mouth How did that even get in there? He didn't even realize bees could fly further than an arms-length away from a hive Maybe the swarm he reared as a child? Hmm This brings back distant memories Whilst on the drugs This memory seems clearer than any of the others Was this actual a memory or a dream? He's long since given up any efforts to try and distingush between both He follows it and it leads to hatefulniss and herself To their wedding day Then, another happens and it leads him back to right now Him offering a sacrifice to the fearsome foursome who stands above In between the two sets of memories, you are shown her face from different angles as she monologues while ripping pieces of flesh off her own skull You briefly wonder what's happening but then find out as a horrible pain radiates through your mind He follows it and it leads to hatefulniss and herself Hatefullniss was one of the few remaining gaints who was able to weave what the other lowbloods dubbed "real psychic powers" Another memory comes rushing back, her, throwing a knife directly at your heart but missing when you dodged it Seems she tried ot kill you first after all The torture continues for some time and then suddenly stops, Hate's brain no longer functioning You stand there contemplating revenge on the rest of them, you know you can take them but the slightest movement results in horrendous pain alongside your sudden exhaustion Hatefullniss was one of the few remaining gaints who was able to weave what the other lowbloods dubbed "real psychic powers" That didnt care for anyones dreams how to snap her out of the trance or try to seek outside help if they really wanted to free however there were of not The hatred in your eyes knowing no bounds, you left after saluting the corpses of the four most important trolls in your life leaving a guard as well with tears streaming from his eyes That didnt care for anyones dreams how to snap her out of the trance or try to seek outside help Hatefulniss had just the thing to wake her, a stinger filled with a venemous toxic that could bring the largest kraken to a feable human level of pain But now it tore through your very being You moan in agony as he watches you writhe and attempts to wake yuo up willing his own strength into you Despite his best efforts you give one last cry and then your body just stops responding completely a stinger filled with a venemous toxic that could bring the largest kraken to a feable human level of pain What cleverniss didnt know was the stinger was once a gift from boundedniss The day her colony had been ambushed, she had used it on one of the poor guards, he was still alive when they found him, all the others had seemingly fallen to brute force but an incredibly deadly venom Once he noticed her lack of breathing he takes his own dagger and ends his pitiful life You are unlike your surrogate parent in many ways Boundedniss needed the attention of hatefulniss but he wouldnt return it you truly loved hatefulniss, no else matter to you even if she thought otherwise But in the end, you both did what was needed and paid the price Why am I shown this? So boundedniss created and filled the stinger with unwanted parts of some of his dreams there was no creature too evil, no insect too deadly and no plant too poisonous It would surpass all the other gifts in lethality and was only to be used on someone if they desired that fate A fate nobody ever desired, it even caught the attention of those watching dreams when it happened So boundedniss created and filled the stinger with unwanted parts of some of his dreams, He expected hatefullniss would eventually get angry enough to use it on him, he even made sure the blow darts were easy enough to craft and refill so anyone could use them Once they were used all he needed to do was capture the remaining versipellis near his cave and his legacy would live on forever Yet it had been you who always rushes into danger, the least likely to use his tools You had a darker streak than humerous would have ever given you credit for He expected hatefullniss would eventually get angry enough to use it on him, Some loathsome use the stinger on himself and then hatefulniss would be his forever bonded through pain The seemingly kind sveld into the darkest and most twisted desire of the mortal soul, snuffing out the weakest parts until its vile legacy no longer held any sway, with Hatefullniss now dead all would be lost Not just the future of those in this facility, but quite literally the future of civilization itself Some loathsome use the stinger on himself and then hatefulniss would be his forever, But before this could happen hatefulniss gave the stinger over to cleverniss to use on you, who knows why except perhaps out of guilt Between your horrible suffering and fascinating dying screams, he manages to get past you thrashing ; (A side effect he later finds out of uses his hypnosis power greatly before passing away from his self inflicted wounds) Snatching the dart he jams it into your chest and giving one last grand effort at stopping the feeling simply shuts down leaving a deep curiosity were hatred once was then But before this could happen hatefulniss gave the stinger over to cleverniss to use on you, After find kindniss still entranced with boundednis, She gave him one tearly look, and then dissappeared up the tunnel her feelings clear for all to see But will that be enough? Will anyone else realize these new emotions before you've died? And after your agonizing death, will they learn the hidden code inside the notes and want to use it for themselves? But most importantly, will your sacrifice have meant anything if people can rise above their lower natures anyway? and then dissappeared up the tunnel her feelings clear for all to see Cleverniss could not stand being without kindniss so he stung himself and dissappeared too leaving the now ruler less plain of existance, the whole lower caste suddenly had no authority figures anywhere to be found they eventually went crazy and rioted their way all through the belt, crushing dreams and hope in everyone they met then building it back up again with a faith that peace and anarchy were the way to live These renegade casteless formed deep friendships based on love and respect not merely for the individual but for life itself as a whole Cleverniss could not stand being without kindniss so he stung himself and dissappeared too leaving the now ruler less plain of existance, While it looked as if she dissappeared, she really hadnt she was just building an army! There really was no place for lower nivirliens to go in this world and so eventually the space fairing portion of the stained population died out as the few remaining settled on the planet closest to the sun This though left the problem of what to do with a planet that would rapidly become uninhabitable she really hadnt she was just building an army! She just shrunk to a much smaller size and used what life was left there to sustain her own until she could think of a way to fix the problems that would arise and she evolved into much smaller versions of herself to inhabit even the remotest places on its surface While the air would one day burn away the life that remained, it proved more than enough for her and hatred was never seen again She just shrunk to a much smaller size and used what life was left there to sustain her own until she could think of a way to fix the problems that would arise and she evolved into much smaller versions of herself to inhabit even the remotest places on its surface So did cleverniss and awoke next to kindniss inside a dark cave realizing as ones greatest hate dies so does one's ability to see outside of normal vision, sound was dull and taste was simply non existent Still it was good waking up next to the one you loved in a soft bed of sleeping worms But you couldn't stay here, both of you would eventually die because the darkness just wouldn't support you both anymore after all this time So did cleverniss and awoke next to kindniss inside a dark cave realizing as ones greatest hate dies so does one's ability to see outside of normal vision, Sadly putting your blind faith in love would be no salvation, even after calling out to anger for help he could not find you in time and the both of you eventually starved to death while the whole planet died around you in one last outburst of violence Both assumed new forms in this place so she no longer looked like a giant wasp and accepted her love for him only Hope is truly the most resilient emotion of all it seems but not durable enough to survive forever The moral of this story is to enjoy the good stories whenever they are around because you never know when they may be taken from this world Revel in your victories small or large as they will probably be the most feels you'll find anywhere Both assumed new forms in this place so she no longer looked like a giant wasp and accepted her love for him only They both had wings where they didnt before and they could move through space as easily as most of your people walk through air, kindniss was happy now and she had truly evolved into heaven even if it really was just the giant planet closest to the sun today They both had wings where they didnt before and they could move through space as easily as most of your people walk through air, They both had a single eye where they didnt before so they could precieve time and dimensions like a giant and could move through 8 different plains of existence as easily andhealthy people walk around They took great joy stringing lines together with the ludicrously high number string they had for friends and exploring all sorts of games that appeared to those that didn't share their eyesight, mostly ending abruptly when one of them forgot and tried interacting normally with society causing an outrage with their completely alien appearance They both had a single eye where they didnt before so they could precieve time and dimensions like a giant and could move through 8 different plains of existence as easily andhealthy people walk around They both had a large stinger attached to two large sacks full of a powerful creative fluid that could regenerate things instantly as long as it wasnt completely destroyed They both had a large stinger attached to two large sacks full of a powerful creative fluid that could regenerate things instantly as long as it wasnt completely destroyed they both had new names given to them that better reflected their form and personality, kindniss became kinn as it was shorter and after all he was completely the apendge of cleret now Cleg became cleret as the shortened version of his name suited him since he wasn't a proud but lonely beast any more they both had new names given to them that better reflected their form and personality, Fatherqueen and motherking they were often called by others, much shorter and sweet sounding names suited to creatures that had never discriminated between each other the whole time they had known each other Fatherqueen and motherking they were often called by others, The poison was still working on motherking so she forgot her beauty and queenliness The poison was still working on motherking so she forgot her beauty and queenliness She began to sting the fatherqueen repeatly telling him that she loved him as her vision dificiencies returned and their eternity of hell started with a single tear She began to sting the fatherqueen repeatly telling him that she loved him as her vision dificiencies returned and their eternity of hell started with a single tear The created fluid turned to posion inside hime again and destroyed him from the inside out, ending the planet's chance of ever recovering Sadly the gases let loose from his death stabbed deeply into her stomach where their twins lay and killed them instantly Their unborn babies died, their twin children that they had created in a moment of passion before everything began They would never exist Even on this setting the machines were powerful enough to take lives before they even began to exist The created fluid turned to posion inside hime again and destroyed him from the inside out, Causing him to forget his wits and he returned favor with stings back to the motherqueen From out of the holes in bodies wadodds and oddwads emerged to attack as they were forgotten by the death of their parents so caught up in rage they were left off limits to memoryloss As the focused on killing each other elderwads and great elderwads and numbuls rose out of the ground in silent troops while the original anoying screamer never stopped speading its mechanical noise through the dull air allowing its unblinking eye to follow the fatherqueen learning hatred and blaming all other life for his own weakness From out of the holes in bodies wadodds and oddwads emerged to attack as they were forgotten by the death of their parents so caught up in rage they were left off limits to memoryloss They collected themselved together and began to take on shapes that, while odd, were logical according to there combined forms It studied them and classified as an amoeba with a million or so legs made of tiny little hands with squirming little arms on the end They collected themselved together and began to take on shapes that, Some gather into bright stars and suns that lit up the sky while others bent the laws of physicc and perspective to create glowing cyclops-like beings that looked like flames with a single green eye for a incorporeal body Maybe of my species had created these things with our minds and creativeness, but we did not possess this carefree innocence, this creativity with this lack of bounds This only comes in purest forms where life and death have not yet touched Some gather into bright stars and suns that lit up the sky while others bent the laws of physicc and perspective to create glowing cyclops-like beings that looked like flames with a single green eye for a incorporeal body Others gather into hard rocks and sludge back into the ground that they had once been arranged from originally I had not thought the other lifeformsHere capable of making such things out of their stuch structure, but I was certainly wrong This is just fascinating to watch what happens to those who have died without a soul Life can truly be created just by using your imagination Others gather into hard rocks and sludge back into the ground that they had once been arranged from originally Fatherqueen and motherking difted apart hating each The entities fatherqueen created to impress the motherking heard his cries and found him alone without the attention of the motherqueen and comforted him by becoming a dark void that took away all his pain temporarily As an entirity they took on an odd structure as the rest this siblings had created for themselve sand gathered around them like a whirlwind of tiny little hands that caressed every part of their skin pleasuring both pain to feel alive again and pleasure in order sot that they would never forget this new drug-like high they had experienced The entities fatherqueen created to impress the motherking heard his cries and found him alone without the attention of the motherqueen and comforted him by becoming a dark void that took away all his pain temporarily He powers of boundedniss made it impossible for them to communicate or create anythin under their limits boundedniss made it impossible for them to communicate or create anythin under their limits I have notes somewhere about the boundless that they create in1s and 0s but I could never understand them or add any more onto that language All I know it was able to be created by my species, who were beings of creativity to made such a language lacking substance of the being it once was He powers of boundedniss made it impossible for them to communicate or create anythin under their limits The four spirit animals need to be created first into the minds here before anything else may happen I cannot risk allowing them to grow too powerful as my own father did and absorb Life itself, ripping it from all things living and dead = life's self and growing a consciousness of its t and becoming a life God The four spirit animals need to be created first into the minds here before anything else may happen To reclaim all the oddwadds to grow cleverniss amongst them to become adult at their current age of their life and be able to tako on the appearance as real residents here Moving decently quickly through the streets I noticed how everything had started to change like one big dream in front of me, they all turned black and white only differentiating from each other by type and size rather than colour some streest stayed in colour for a while, but it seemed patterned after something was created before it would became black and white too To reclaim all the oddwadds to grow cleverniss amongst them to become adult at their current age of their life and be able to tako on the appearance as real residents here Once he is full grown he can go back in with his old awareniss and transform kindniss back into what they once were Then as a group they will probably create the old origin of where each oddwaddy came from and will grow a back bone to split off with siblings to populate new worlds and other dimensions Once he is full grown he can go back in with his old awareniss and transform kindniss back into what they once were This must be when I lost my ability to see and record that dream I really hope this happens so I can start seeing colour again I will record in black and white Who knows, it might become colorful to me again one day The weather cleared that night for the first time in a few weeks We went outside to watch the stars, and saw the most amazing sight in the sky Compared to how it usually is, the Milky Way had merged from its previous look, into an almost unbroken stream of stars that spanned nearly a third of the visible sky We all just huddled together outside Cassy's diner, looking upwards in amazement at this beautiful new apparition in our night sky When morning came, I could sense that there had been some changes to the town It was as if, everything had settled in its place Jake had sensed it too, and we went into town together to speak to your friend Elton at the gas station about what he might think had caused this new merger of the Milky Way "It came out of the mines! That's what did it,

0 notes

thoughtsofahouseplant · 2 years ago

Photo

#you think we're dancing? that's all we've ever done#it really IS all they've ever done look at them!!!!!!!#right from the start they've just had this way of moving with each other as if they had spent a life time by each others side @147days your tags here are melting my mind holy shit

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER 2.22 | “Becoming” Part 2

#they really do!!!!! just GET each other~!!!!!!#bc they work the Same way!!#and that also shows up on a physical level and it's so obvious when you look for it aaaaah #spuffy #it's the endless mirroring of percieving for me

887 notes · View notes

hereticaloracles · 8 years ago

Text

Full Moon in Sagittarius- Rebels & Rogues

“The question is not whether we will be extremists, but what kind of extremists we will be- Will we be extremists for hate or for love? Will we be extremists for the preservation of injustice or for the extension of justice?” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

Helios’ Astrological Angle on the Full Moon in Sagittarius– Here we go again y’all… Now, a lot of you might be groaning at this one, because both Gemini and Sagittarius are very much an acquired taste, zodiacally speaking- And now we get to deal with both! Aren’t we lucky? These two get a lot of crap because they are arguably the most ephemeral signs that there are (Mutable Air and Mutable Fire); and it’s true, when it comes to practical matters and actually doing the work, these two leave a lot to be desired. Not every situation calls for practicality and just doing the work though (*clunk* Okay, someone go help all the earth signs who just fainted); Sometimes the problem is ideology, the way we think about things and our worldview- and this is where these two excel. Revolutions are not won with force of arms, they are won through hearts and minds.

Artemis’ Tarot Take on the Full Moon in Sagittarius- This is the last lunation in Saggo that will have the pleasure of being smack dab on top of Saturn’s energy. We must walk with the ideological ghosts of the past 2 years – the intensity of everything that has happened and all of the trails we have gone through- brought forward by the bringer of death; Saturn. How have you transformed? Who have you become? Have you become a truer version of your ideal self – have you chosen time and time again to stick to your guns and walk the talk? This is a confusing sort of energy. We have Jupiter mixed with Saturn and Chiron, a sort of mournful start to a new journey and end to ideas and people we held dear for a very long time. But the lessons we have learned the past few years while Saturn has been in Saggo have all been a tremendous test to our conviction – our big picture – and how personal philosophy truly does effect the world at large. Saturn in Saggo teaches us truly why everything is so fucking hard… Because it is so fucking important. You ready for the lightening, Heretics?

The Sun, Moon, Jupiter, Neptune and Pluto– Every good heroic epic needs a villain or two, right? Well this time the villain is you. Last time you were waiting, restless, and aimless; Not so with this Moon. You realized (or will) that what you were running from was yourself. Your fear of the future and what could be blocked you from seeing what you could do about it. Well, now we’re here- you have two choices, run or stand up and be counted. Your future depends on what you do in this time, and for once you actually feel ready for the challenge. Amazingly, this is the first time you have truly felt competent since the Cardinal Crisis began, and its only about a million years too late. Use it now.

The trouble with this lunation is that you can miss the forest for the trees. What you seek is contentment, security, being able to plan for your future and provide for you and yours, but at every turn it seems like the world has a personal vendetta against you. After realizing that you’re not clinically insane, you try to root out the cause of your discontent, why you keep coming up against a brick wall- You find some possible reasons, and make necessary adjustments, but still you struggle. You keep the process up, but nothing changes. What could the problem be? So you do deeper and deeper work on yourself and life, but nothing helps. Stop me when I get to where you’re at in your journey. Well, the issue not any one thing- it is the greater YOU that is standing in your way, specifically the you that percieves the world and tries to jockey for your position in it. I’ll probably get my official Darkworker card revoked for this, but it isnt enough to just try and get yours and hope that everyone else will make it- No, we are seeing where that gets us, and going much further down that road will only prove to be all of our undoing… then again, chasing worldly power and materialism above all else was never what true Darkworking was about. What we see on display right now is a toxic and twisted version of the Path, but it is hard to not have it draw out those parts of yourself what would lead you down that road.

I have no antidote to this, all I can say is that whenever you find your more cruel or sadistic side coming out, try to rubberband yourself back to who you really are by doing whatever the opposite of the urge is. Let it pass like a river moving through rocks. This is not at all to say that you need to go full wishy-washy “blessed be”, turning the other cheek Lightworker– No, thats a great way to get yourself senselessly killed these days. These days demand heroes, those willing to stand and fight against the very worst of us. These days are frightening, and the spectre of our own mortality looms over us all. If we are to truly survive we need to push back against those who try and push us over the cliffs of despair and fear, holding the line against them. Before you can fight that battle however, you need to win the war raging within you.

(Minor Planets used: Ceres, Juno, Vesta, Black Moon Lilith, Sila-Nunam, Varda, Siwa, Narcissus, Chariklo, Okyrhoe, Asbolus, Teharonhiawako, Mors-Somnus, Ceto, Cyllarus, Arachne)

The Sun(Queen of Swords), The Moon(Emperor), Jupiter(Ace of Cups), Neptune(The Lovers), Pluto(Knight of Wands)- Things die for one reason and one reason only; they are not eternal. Life is endless transformation, endless fire, endless forging as we go upon our journey. We will tell any lie possible to keep ourselves on our sinking ship, and you will see plenty of ships on fire during this lunation, Heretics. Either people are going to soar like eagles, or they are going to burn in the cage they have created for themselves. Saggo knows to run when something doesn’t suit them anymore. You should take note. Always follow your highest philosophical ideal, and the past 2 years of Saturn’s influence on our Sagittarian houses has taught us that. You must live up to your ideal at all costs, or else you are just digging your own grave. You run from the responsibility of it – your grand purpose and the work required to get there, and this full moon will show you that the responsibility of your ideals is what truly breathes life and structure into your existence. You must figure out what story merges all the different parts of you into one cohesive whole, and through this you can obtain the highest level of healing and redemption. And you need to tell that story, with all the fire you have left inside of you.

So use it, the last 2 fucking years, Heretics, use the pain and the illumination that you have received during this time and speak your goddamn truth – no safe spaces allowed. You have been met with situation after situation that has tested your philosophical grounds- that has challenged you over and over again to choose the hard route, the route via what your heart truly wants instead of being chained to mistakes and false ideologies. This moon wants to know just how strong you have grown, so it’s going to throw irritation and gloom and depression your way until you psychotically just let go and allow the light to come in – until you say fuck it and live as your unabashed self and prove that you can be emotionally robust – OPTIMISM, HERETICS! This is a stand up for your fucking self moon – a truth saying moon – a moon that asks you to stab the forked tongued snakes you see in your path, hindering you from climbing the mountain.

This is a huge taste of what this whole North Node in Leo is about. There is a deliverance here, a fiery ending to your 2 years of ideological transformation of the self. People will fucking hate you, no joke there. They will hiss at you and bite at you, but you must be yourself. They will tell you it is for your own fucking good; that the caress of the illusion they are feeding you is a far nicer world and everyone will somehow burst out into a musical version of happiness. Nah, cut through like a blade, Heretics, for this is a truth saying moon and the gods will only bless you with illumination on your path if you stand your ground and stand your convictions. And, hell, you don’t know who is watching… you have no idea who you are inspiring. There is nothing like someone living from their core that lights up the people around them to actually accomplish shit. Stop lying to yourself, stop lying to others – you are merely letting Saturn cement your feet and throw you into the river… You don’t fucking want to go into that river, Heretics… The South Node is in Aquarius, so take all of the things you learned about rebellion and start applying them toward rebellion for the TRUTH, your truth, the one you always know about yourself but run from like a little bitch. Which way are you going to go? Will you sell out, or get out? This lunation is a grand trine in fire (North Node, Saturn, and Uranus), and if you must merge your opposites – your rebel and your cleric – to fuel your magnetism of the self, to give that fiery, liberating sermon.

Mercury, Venus, Mars– THANK THE GODS, WE HAVE PROGRESS! Mercury, Venus and Mars are all in new signs after what feels like forever. Interestingly, they are also completely removed from the rest of the stellar drama, which mirrors our situation right now; While two ideological viewpoints duke it out and rage at each other until they are blue in the face, the rest of us are just trying to get along with our lives. Honestly we all kind of just want to be left alone, and that is totally okay. Unfortunately, no man is an island, and we all have to deal with varying degrees of annoying in our lives. Well, while we are used to fighting all the time with the endless Venus Retrograde we just went through, now we have to start really getting along with each other. The best way to do that is to just kind of give everyone else a break, because we all need to recover. It’s okay not to be okay right now. You don’t need to be, take the Venus in Taurus and Mars in Cancer time to lick your wounds- Just be ready for the Leo eclipses. Set that as your deadline, and do whatever you need to be ready for them. Be kinder to yourself, the Cardinal Crisis version of therapy where you shadowbox and treat yourself as a punching bag so that everyone else doesn’t? That has to end. We’re out of that paradigm, and it has never felt more unreal than it does now- For some reason, these three switching signs against the backdrop of all these retrogrades makes them shine out like a beacon, showing us that there’s a way out. Take it.

(Minor Planets used: Eros, Nemesis, Tantalus, Orius, Sphinx, Apophis)

Mercury(6 of Wands), Venus(2 of Pentacles), Mars(The Fool)- Ugh, this Mars in Cancer has everyone in passive aggressive, moody bitch mode. Irritated much? Feeling like you can’t get enough resources to get the shit done that you need to get done? Well, blame Mars, because for some goddamn reason he wont let us be okay with where we are right now. We are being torn apart by two different feelings here. On one hand, we want nothing more than to hermit up in our high castle and get away from the chaos that the world is turning into… but on the other hand, we are being called. We want victory. We want recognition. We want the glories of our past and the glories of our imagination. Your mind is active as all hell while your body is crying to be left alone, but you must move, Heretics! Fire of the soul is just as important as any material possession, and this lunation is begging you to find a source for all of that creativity. Put it into something nurturing for yourself and those around you but also utilizing your personal talents (how do you think the two of us got into this field of work?) You need something to dedicate yourself to or you will continue feeling restless, but you really have no idea where that thing is going to take you. If you plan too far ahead, you will have more disappointment than you can handle. Take a note from Saturn in Saggo and take the journey one step at a time, open and ready to all possibility with a dedication for the grander truth of the situation.

Saturn, Uranus, Chiron– Yes, you see that correctly. Chiron is usually just here to round out the numbers, but here he is the breakout star of the lunation. This time Chiron is pulling double duty, showing us both what we cannot stand in ourselves anymore and what we could be. The whole Chirotic process is on display here, and its fitting that he is with the two planets that he goes between, showing the growth from Saturn to Uranus. There are big, massive, gestalt-y changes coming for you, and you are going to need to be ready for them. The goal and design of those changes? To impel you towards your Liberation. We are all trapped in prisons of our own design, where we torment ourselves over mistakes that we have made and fears that we have and we think the whole world is lined up outside our cell waiting to jeer at us too. Well, I have a news flash for y’all- No one else is out there, waiting to crucify you. No one else has any idea what eats you up inside and quite frankly none of them care, unless maybe they’re screwing you. So why not come down off of your cross, huh?

What’s more none of those cells are locked. No, the door is wide open, you just stay in there beating yourself up and crying because it’s easier, because then you dont have to try, not if you’ve already failed. You don’t have to fight the battle if the war is already lost. The thing is, the war is not lost, and neither are you, at least not yet. There is still reason to keep going, even when all you want to do is collapse so that you can finally get the rest you so desprately need. Seek oblivion some other time, we need you in the here and now. Your time is not yet up, so you need to start acting like it- Stand up and get out of your comfortable cage, there’s a world out there that needs you.

(Minor Planets used: Pallas Athene, Pandora, Ixion, Quaoar, Varuna, Eris, Sedna, Manwe, Icarus, Pholus, Rhadamanthus, Typhon, Hebe, Isis, Damocles, Orpheus)

Saturn(8 of Pentacles), Uranus(Queen of Wands), Chiron(9 of Swords)- Truth bombs, Heretics, that’s what we have here. Expect people to be coming out with them, and expect a lot of those truth bombs to be hurtful, because, hell, none of us are actually on the right path. We all stray. We all get lost in the brush for one reason or another, and sometimes it takes a phone call from mom or someone standing up to your egoism to get the message across. You aren’t where you need to be, and that is causing you some severe anxiety. But hey, this is the perfect opportunity to manifest what you need. It’s not too late, Heretics, for the fire of summer is here and with it a lot more energy and creativity. Saturn wants you to work work work (doesn’t he fucking always), but this time work for “God,” however you perceive that. Work for your higher truth, rebelling against all of the things you know are illusions around you. Empires are collapsing all around us, the world is under a massive transformation as Saturn is gearing to go into Capricorn where we will have one of the greatest stelliums of our time – a rocking and shaking of all the structures and powers that be.

You need to have a grand vision that will get you through the times ahead, a philosophy that has been tempered by the past 2 years to perfection – and, above all, you must have faith regardless of what happens. This is the optimism of Saggo. If you don’t have faith, what is the fucking point? Faith, but work, faith, and rebel, faith that you can heal – and you will heal. Now cleanse yourself with fire, Heretics, and come out with an unshakable confidence in self and the future for the end of this summer brings a Full Solar Eclipse in Leo (our North Node) which will be completely and utterly visible in the United States with a trine to Uranus/Eris… What will this mean for you? What will this mean for the USA? Oh lord… Stay tuned, rebels, and start fucking speaking your truth and start speaking it loud…

Full Moon in Sagittarius- Rebels & Rogues was originally published on Heretical Oracles

#full moon sagittarius #grand trine in fire #jupiter direct #mars in cancer #rose moon #strawberry moon #venus in taurus #astrology #tarot #asteroid astrology #fuckstrology #bruja #brujeria

0 notes